HLIB: Madness

Mula sa kinatatayuan ko ay kitang-kita ko kung paano niya lunurin ang sarili niya sa alak. I've been to a lot of hell, pero alam kong, mas sobra ang pinagdadaanan niya ngayon kaysa sa mga pinagdaanan ko.

I've seen how deeply hurt he was when River stood him up, I've seen the way he looked at her, the way he smiled when he saw her, the way she brightened his day. I've seen alot. And I know, I need to do something for them to break apart.

Lumapit na ako sa kinaroroonan niya bago pa may mga talipandas na nama na lumapit sa kanya. 

The day when River and i went to his condo and saw that girl, wala akong kaalam-alam doon, that's why I reacted that way, hamakin mo, ang mahal mo may ksamang ibang babae sa condo niya?!

Napatigil sa ere ang hawak niyang drink ng makita niya ako.

"What?" He asked.

"Let's go."

"What do you want?"

"you're drunk."

"No I'm not."

"Hindi ka ba nagsasawa na sa bawat gabi ng buhay mo ay tumutungga ka?? Napapagod na akong sunduin ka sa tuwing nalalasing ka!"

"Hindi ko naman sinabi sayo na puntahan mo ako diba??"

"Oo, pero I'm worried."

"You don't need to be worried."

"Vash, that night-."

"Oh shut up Lindsey!"

"Why should i shut up when you made me feel important with just a fleeting seconds Vash??"

"That was just a kiss."

"No it wasn't! You kissed me!"

"Yeah, so?"

The night of their monthsary, I was there, I also waited. Doon ko nakita ang labis niyang pag-aalala sa isang tao and i know that moment I already gave my heart to him. He was really devastated, i was with him when he tried to find her.

I was there when he knew that River spent the night with Hiro, but he kept his mouth shut, he pretended he doesn't know a thing. Alam kong masakit sa parte niya lalo pa at nalaman niyang ang nag-iisang kapatid niya ay nagloloko.At alam kong ang mga itinuring niyang kaibigan ay pinagtakpan ang kasalanan ng dalawang taong importate sa kanya.

And how did she found out that River really spent the night with Hiro? He contacted all of her friends, including her teammates para malaman kung nasaan siya, but his sister Venice told us that she actually saw River with Hiro that night.

Alam kong masakit sa part ni Vash, alam kong masakit sa kanya na ang nag-iisang babaeng minahal niya ay niloko siya pero nagpaka martyr pa rin siya. His reasons?

Maniniwala lamang siyang may namamagitan kina Hiro at River kung makikita ng dalawang mata niyang niloloko nga siya. And he actually saw.

I won't elaborate more kung paano niya nakita at paano niya nahuli sina River.

"Come on." Ako

"You know what, stop acting like my Mom, come here, sit here with me and let's drink to death!"

Tumabi na ako sa kanya. Alam kong mauulit lamang ang drama namin sa tuwing nalalasing siya.

Nakailang shots pa lamang ako ng magsimula ng maglitanya si Vash.

"You know what? I consider you as my bud!"

"Why?"

"You never left my side though even my friends betrayed me."

"Because I love you."

"F*ck that love! Tingnan mo nga ginawa ng pagmamahal sayo? Sa akin??"

Vash knows about my Ex Diego. Kahit na sinabi kong lalayuan ko na si Diego but he keeps on hunting me, kaya wala akong magagawa but to stick with him.

"Even if she betrayed you, I will never do that, kasi mahal kita, mahal na mahal kita at gagawin ko ang lahat, makalimutan mo siya."

"How can you say that thing infront of me kung kapatid mo siya?"

"She's not my sister for Christ sake! I hate her, hated her for so long!"

"Pero mukhang okay naman kayo ah?"

Hindi ko masabi kay Vash na the only reason why I choose to befriend River was all because of him.

"You know what? Nasaktan rin pala ako, ganoon pala yung feeling ng nasasaktan?" Vash

"Yeah."

"I did everything for her, I gave everything for her, the S*x? I made it all so good, Nangako ako eh, nangako ako sa mga pesteng pangakong yan, umasa ako, nagsugal ako, pero eto pa igaganti niya? Saan ba ako nagkulang? Pinaramdam ko naman sa kanya lahat ah? bakit siya pa rin? Bakit sa kaibigan ko pa? Bakit ang best friend ko pa rin ang mahal niya?"

"Vash..."

"You know what? Everytime she begs for me to talk to her, I hold every emotions i have on her, dahil gusto kong maranasan niya rin ang nararanasan ko, ang naransan ko ng niloko niya at sinaktan niya ako. Tell me? Am i that bad huh? Na kahit na pareho na kaming nasasaktan, i still hold my feelings back para di ko lamang siya mayakap sa tuwing nakikita ko siyang nasasktan ng dahil sa akin."

"WAG KA NG BUMALIK SA KANYA!"

"Gusto ko lang namang ibalik ang tiwala ko sa kanya para kapag naging okay na ang lahat, hindi ko na maaalala ang panloloko niya. Pero ano? Makikita ko siyang masaya at nakikipagtawanan sa Nathan na iyon? Pinapakita niya lang na gagawin na naman niya akong tanga kapag nakipagbalikan ako sa kanya!"

"Tama na vash! Tama na yung lahat ng ginawa mo para sa kanya, tama ng nahuli mo na siyang kinakalanti ang kaibigan mo!"

"Kahit na tang*na nasakta na niya ako, andito pa rin siya eh, andito pa rin siya sa puso ko! P*ta! Kung ganito pala ang pagmamahal sana di nalamang ako nagmahal!"

"Forget about her! She doesn't deserve someone like you!"

"Its..Its...so hard...so hard to forget someone... someone who gave you so much...so much to remember."

"I'm here!"

"Yes you're here and you're making things more complicated than what I've thought! Pareho kaming nagkasala, Icheated on her, i kissed you and that was a mistake, then she, she cheated on me."

Tumayo na si Vash and all i can do is to help him walk straightly until sa condo niya. The moment he seated on the pasengers seat alam kong nakatulog na siya so i drived him home.

I started to take his shoes off of him ng nasa bed na siya when i heard him saying something.

"What?"

Bigla siyang naupo. He stared at me for a moment.

"Come here." He said

Lumapit ako sa kanya, pinaupo niya ako sa kandungan niya. literal na nagulat ako, pero di ko pinahalata lalo na ng nagsimula siyang halikan ako sa leeg ko.

"You're the most wonderful girl I've ever met."

"Am I?"

"Yes."

He made me face him. He stared at  me again and then he lowered his face unto mine. Naramdaman ko na lamang ang labi ni Vash sa labi ko. At first, it was just a simple kiss pero nahalinhinan iyon ng kakaibang klase ng halik. His kisses turned aggressive and wanting.

And all I can do is to give that kiss for him..

Lalo na ng tinaas niya na ang t-shirt ko. I know, I know, something will happen, something.. i won't forget for the rest of my freakin life, something that made me so happy but at the same time caused my heart break.

Because when he reached his peak, he said something that broke my heart into a million pieces.

"River. I love you." Vash said.